Launch Day
In the late 1980s, when I was still discovering what it meant to be a girl growing up on the cusp of the new millennium, I became interested in the idea of writing a fictional novel. I was an ambitious nine-year-old, a voracious reader, and consistently getting top marks for stories I would craft for class. And then the real impetus behind it all - I was always most happy when I was writing. I would have rather locked myself away to write on a summer day than follow in the local kids’ footsteps: swimming at the beach or playing with water balloons in their front yards. I was fortunate and delighted that creating worlds for my characters to live in came to me so easily. I experienced infinite entertainment by pursuing these amusements. I remember relentlessly thinking, how cool would it be to become an author? The answer was: very cool.
One problem. A little box showed me fantastic scenarios, with actors that were alive and more real to me than anything I could imagine. My friends, parents, and everyone I knew thought that the little box was intriguing. I, too, became intrigued with this medium of how to tell a narrative. I began to think: how cool would it be to become a screenwriter? The answer was: very cool.
So I put the idea of becoming a novelist on hold and pursued the notion of movie-making. After all, they made movies in my backyard. It seemed easier to accomplish than writing a novel, and I didn’t have to be a literary genius. I could intern and participate in summer camps and go to school for this gig. I also found it fascinating to see how the filmmaking process involved a team of people, instead of being alone at a desk - like I’d always experienced writing.
What a blast. Making television shows, having coffee with music composers, color correcting film stock at a lab in Burbank, all these memories were made to last. But in those moments, something was still missing. And no editing bay could cut the scene or ADR dialogue that would fix the hole that I was silently slipping into. I’d never given up writing. I always jotted down ideas, plots, and characters and thought about how maybe I should hang up the movie biz and pursue the passion that always ignited me. I was concerned that leaving something so exhilarating would be tough. But having written all my life, I knew I wasn’t losing anything - but gaining what I wanted.
I’ve always wanted to be a novelist. The idea of being alone writing at a desk thrills me once again. I’ve always felt most at home doing that. I love creating worlds for others to read and enjoy. It is where I belong, where I’ve always belonged. So I’ll be there. I will write a novel. Many novels.